Love dashed out the door with a surprising speed not suspected before. So I pulled on my pants and chased her to the lawn, but Love had turned the corner and she was gone. Love must have had her running shoes on. So I jumped in my car and drove all around, searched the whole town with a trusty bloodhound, but when Love left she covered her track. Now my wife's jewelry is gone, and Love demands bitcoins, or she won't bring it back.
Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief