Nowadays, we ignore good poetry
and bad poetry is all we read.
Which is great news!
Because based on the time and energy
we Facebook friends have devoted
to pummeling this wretched rhyming piece,
insipid drivel must be the last
evil thing to walk the world.
Congratulations to us!
We have saved humanity
(as I knew we would)
with our sarcasm and snide tweets.
Such a preening and sanctimonious fixation
on bursting this quivering bubble of buffoonery tells me
snowcaps have reappeared on mountaintops
and polar bears sit on new icebergs merrily munching seals,
liars have recanted and corrected the record,
dictators have restored freedoms and retired,
torturers have questioned career choices and quit,
pedophile priests have been put in prison
and the Vatican has sold its gold for Bitcoin
to compensate the unfortunate children
it allowed to be raped.
So having saved the world
from every evil but one,
we can now dedicate
our capricious communal scorn
to crushing this thin, gasping thing.
Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief