Easter Service on Stone Mountain

When the sun began to rise so, too, did the deacon
scaling that sacred rock to the Nimbus Arena
where the Holy Trinity resides in petrified consternation.

He plopped himself down at the left hand of Lee,
gave a grim nod to Stonewall on his stony steed,
and from the lap of Jefferson Davis
proclaimed the good news:

Heritage is the Way                    of preserving power;
the Truth                                        tamed by tradition;
and the Life                                    lived in the past.

Heritage is the burning cross illuminating
the Master's house in the cotton-filled clouds.

So blessed be heritage’s most zealous defenders
for they shall inherit the blistered remains of the earth.

Blessed, too, be any deed done in the name of heritage,
no matter how heinous, for heritage sanctions everything
except change.

Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief

Facebook Friends

If a waning moon
is still a moon
then we were children.

We were also wet
and nearly naked,
half-hidden in the dark,
hoping our drunk parents
would remain dumb.

Our probing tongues
made easy promises
that tasted like truth
with a dash of delusion.

But now the moon is new
and we are Facebook friends.
We share our virtual lives;
celebrate our virtual victories
while still hiding in the dark.

Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief 

first published in Artemis


Looking good, McSmugly, looking good!

That's what I hear whenever I see
my marbled face staring back at me.
Not that I seek my reflection out - 
it's just that in my office
I have so many mirrors about.

And who might McSmugly be?
Is that what you're asking?
How have you not heard of me?

I am the Creator

of a law firm:  Swift in Justice LLC.
Visit my website for a wonderful profile of me.
Win a pass for the free parking lot,
and read my motto:

The Truth Is Negotiable - My Fees Are Not. 

I do personal injuries
but I specialize in misdemeanors and felonies.
Are you sure you haven't heard of me?

I have storefronts in two states.
Hell, I drive a gold Lexus with vanity plates.
They say NTGILTY, which is what my clients tell the jury
then I take over and earn my fee,
because alibis don't sound like lies
when they're spoken by me.

I have never lost a case
though my clients have lost quite a few.
But I have no time to rue their fate - 
not when I'm Prometheus chained to an hourly rate.

That's how I live NTGILTY too.
When you charge by the hour, how much you make
depends on how long you stay awake,
and your ability to bill during a bathroom break.

So I never have time to reflect
and the only thing I ever regret
is all those fees I fail to collect.

Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief