By Monday morning, a furious Mrs. Muzzle pounced on Uncle's lap, took her petite paw and gave his smirking lips several wicked smacks. But he continued to talk as if he was used to that repeating a tedious tale about a dubious time when Smear the Queer was a Hunger Game the neighborhood kids would play. And everyone was proud and happy though no one was proud and gay. Problem people stayed silent otherwise they were gagged, and proper people spoke English with a Midwest accent - the same one Jesus had. Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief
Tag Archives: Hypocrisy
The Honor Men
Good God - I almost forgot the Honor Men! Those pillars of conformity with their orange blazers and Jeffersonian rectitude, afflicting us with their boozy breath and stale pretensions in the rotunda. And look how rotund they've grown to be! They're oranges teetering on toothpicks; oranges soaking in whiskey squirting bourbon when squeezed; oranges that should have been left to rot on the trees. Humor the Honor Men! For they upheld the Hypocritic Oath as long as their withered arms could. Humor them because their members have shriveled and their influence has petered out - leaving them petulant and confused because their time has come and gone. But what will happen to the country clubs? Who will boldly sail the shallow waters of our bays? Who will smoke cigars and waylay waitresses? Who will presume to know what everyone wants? Just as I think these thoughts, a vast image of the Tower of Babel troubles my sight. And hundreds of disparate parties espousing thousands of opposing beliefs swell on the lawn like some tumorous growth; each wearing orange and each vowing to uphold the Hypocritic Oath. Luvgood Carp, Editor-in-Chief and Adjunct Professor for Student Loans First published in Scarlet Leaf Review
